Thoughts on (Not) Living in Ho Chi Minh

Wechat freelancer

Hey guys I have been in Ho Chi Minh City for about a month now and after maybe 10ish days my life started following a very predictable pattern. I really do like the city and think it has lots of potential, but sadly it just isn’t for me so I’ll be moving on.

I wake up and work for an hour, go get some food, and then come back and work. It is extremely hot here in the summer time and going anywhere in the day is pretty miserable. On top of that….. where would I go?

In most other cities I would roam a mall but there are no malls really. Or they are so small they would be fully roamed in 15 minutes.

Crossing the street to get a sandwich

Also there is not really any reason to roam malls here because girls don’t appear to have much interest in foreigners.

In One Month Saw No Hot Girls With Foreigners

That is no exaggeration, I saw some 6’s holding hands with white guys, and maybe one 7 but outside of that nothing. I see white guys all the time, I see hot girls all the time, never do I see the two together.

Every coffee shop I walk past I see a handful of girls I find quite attractive. The Vietnamese girls are the most attractive (to me) of any in Southeast Asia. However they also seem to have the least interest in foreigners and stick to their own kind.

Vietnamcupid hottie

I kind of knew this going in so didn’t have high hopes for my number handout strategy but it didn’t take long to realize that this just wasn’t going to work here. Too much effort for too small of a percentage chance.

If they had megamalls where I could kill some hours roaming in the AC I would have given it a real effort, but without I gave up really quickly.

My New Life Strat

So now I wait until the sun starts to go down and head out. I go get some dinner and then either head to Bui Vien for a ‘massage’ or to one of the great Ho Chi Minh City blowjob bars.

For the last 20 days my entire life has revolved around that schedule though I skip the massage or bj every third or fourth day. Is this better then a life in the West? Sure. But for Asia it ranks pretty low on my list.

Jspill tells me there is an amazing clubbing scene where you can safely and openly do drugs, everyone in the club is rolling on ecstasy, ketamine, the waiters can get it for you and there are hot PR girls you hire to party with you and snort K off their wrists.

212 club

But I’m not into that either. Not even into coffee, which is also big in Vietnam.

When you meet a girl on a dating site or out and about they can rarely speak English so there is nothing more than boring ‘how are you’ ‘did you take a dinner yet’ type convos. I am overall a pretty anti social person but I got so used to texting with Pinays over the years it feels weird.

As I mentioned I had one girl come over to my hotel and be super nervous. I tried to close but she was so nervous I guessed she was a virgin and later chat confirmed that.

We made out a bit but wouldn’t take off her clothes even kept her glasses on the whole time and I almost broke them ^^

‘Cuz u so man’

I even logged back on to Filipino Cupid and PinaLove to make some new friends for when I get back there soon. If you are looking for a good girlfriend that may become your wife then I think Vietnam could be a great place to find her (if you have patience with her English.)

Viet girls are hot and that is always a good start. But if you are like me and just want casual hook ups then you will either need to put in a lot of effort for a few rare times, lead girls on, or do like me and spend lots of time in the BJ bars.

There are worse fates I suppose. I’ll give living in Ho Chi Minh another shot at some point. I know there is great potential there and I just need to figure out how to realize it.  I see far too many hot girls around and know there has to be a way to get to some of them.

57 Responses

  1. jspill jspill says:

    I guess dressing sharp, learning vietnamese and partying in the many beer clubs, sky bars and discos is out of the question 🙂

  2. Harley says:

    Vietnamese along with Indo/Malay/Filipino are the easiest Asian languages to learn. I did however get way too drunk in Vietnam, and it almost became an habit. I was drinking every day just to kill my time. Had a few good times and a few bangs, but nothing special. They definitely are “wifey” material. I will probably go back one day just to get shit faced and try my luck again whenever I feel too bored.

  3. Henry says:

    Maybe spirit maze will share his wisdom on how he would have converted this virgin in no time 😉

    This happened to me in Phils too, girls backing out, cause not all girls are slutty as hell, even though Phils is probably easier.

    And they need to be respected…who knows what might happen if u dont – u dont have connections in their country, they probably do.

    • jspill jspill says:

      spirit maze let us know you’re still alive!

    • Spirit maze says:

      I love girls who openly say they want a relationship, and don’t want to hook up. I simply agree to be her bf. Then bang her. Then disappear. Being open with girls about just wanting to hook up has never worked for me.

      Lying to women about being their bf has been my strategy for years, but theres a lot of blowback and there are plenty of women who want me dead. It’s also the oldest trick in the book. I think Casanova used to say anything to get women into bed too.

      I’ve never been to Vietnam, but I banged a few Vietnamese girls in Sydney and they were just as easy as the other Asians there (Koreans, Thais, Chinese etc).

      • Henry says:

        i think its good that u are being open here at least. so now you can share ur real numbers 😉

        so are u ever gonna relax a bit and take it easy, or is the addiction too strong?

        • Spirit maze says:

          I’m at exactly 341 since I started recording my lays in October 2014. Prior to that I estimate I banged about 50. So my total is around 391. I’m 29 years old. I’ll make my blog public soon so you can see my methods, but I guarantee you won’t like it because you appear to respect women and have morals. Jspill already knows the web address, but the blog is currently on private.

          April has been quiet for me. Only 3 so far. But i’ve been lazy.

          • Henry says:

            yeah, sort of, and i dont wanna get death threats of any kind.

            • Spirit maze says:

              That’s the worst part. Filipina’s hate being played. Once they find out, some will try to exact revenge. If they ever find out you’ve done the same thing to other girls on a vast scale, and if they ever have on opportunity to band together, that’s when shit gets really ugly. The have an extraordinary sense of justice and entitlement, and they seem to think that lying to women to get sex is illegal (it’s not).

              I think most guys couldn’t handle the heat of a pinoy vendetta.

              • kick2dante kick2dante says:

                not illegal, but lets just hope karma catches up to you

                moving to a super poor country which is widely considered the easiest place in the world to get laid AND STILL lying to girls to get them into bed when you don’t need to…….. you are scum dude and deserve all the bad shit that comes your way, simple as that

                • Spirit maze says:

                  ……because Filipinos are the most honest people in the world.

                  ‘Ooo please send me money for my tuition’

                  ‘Ooo please send me money to cover medical bills for my dying mother.’

                  Don’t get sanctimonious. We all lie to varying degrees. It’s the currency of the world. It’s up to women to be smarter.

                • kick2dante kick2dante says:

                  oh well some other people murdered people so i guess its ok for you to do it also

                  you are seriously one of the lowest types of expats there is, you were already born with a cheat code by being a white american, then stepped it up by moving abroad…. but thats not enough you have to lead girls on with the american dream

                  its pathetic, not even because it makes it harder for the rest of us but because its just being a prick for no reason

                  i truthfully mean that i hope you get all the bad karma you deserve

                • Spirit maze says:

                  Murder is a bit of a leap mate.

                  Being white isn’t a cheat code anymore. That party is over. In fact, being white makes you an automatic playboy in the eyes of filipinas, which is a handicap.

                  Do you think I’d lie to women if it wasn’t so devastatingly effective?

                  The quality of my notches are insane. Your face would go green with envy if you saw some of the women that I’ve banged recently. And there’s no way I would have banged them if I had have approached them with your honest, ‘I just want casual sex’ approach. They would have laughed in my face.

                  Yeah, I could be like you- Honest, and banging mostly hookers. Or I could sacrifice my soul at the altar of beautiful women. I’ve made my choice and so have you. And I guarantee you I’m not the only one doing this. Check out swoop the world.

        • jspill jspill says:

          Check this story out happened to my friend http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showpost.php?p=43382604&postcount=7649

          And the follow up http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showpost.php?p=47138407&postcount=10333

          Cliffs: lying pinay gets him blacklisted, he gets back in on new passport

          • Spirit maze says:

            Jspill, you’re an absolute wellspring of helpful advice and information for the type of lifestyle that I lead. Thank you.

            • Henry says:

              Hey Spirit Maze, got your email.
              First I wanna say, I am not offended by any of that material you wanna post on your blog.
              I d just be offended by someone constantly lying.

              People on forums tend to exaggerate a lot.

              I have been to SE Asia a lot since 2014 and have my own stories to tell.

              But my numbers are not even close, and thats ok. I dont know anyone who has numbers like yours – and its also not most people’s goal.

              You can of course do whatever the hell you want. if you lie than obv that sucks, if you tell the truth, then you gotta have some serious game and determination and drive.

              You should still ask urself if its all really worth the hassle, but well some guys seem to need the adrenaline rush.

              I am not that much older than you, late 30ies, but i still prefer a more relaxing lifestyle by now.

              • Spirit maze says:

                In my opinion, having Game is lying to women and getting them to believe it. Nice guys finish last and I found that out the hard way.

                You’re obsessed with my numbers. I assure you it is doable. You just have to devote your whole life to it and sell your soul to Satan.

                • kick2dante kick2dante says:

                  sure you could lie to them, or you could just try and be a decent human being

                  we have been with basically the same amount of girls, i’ve lied to none of them, at least not in the leading them on way that you use every time

                  if karma exists then enjoy what you have coming to you

                • Spirit maze says:

                  although…I’ve only paid about 5% of the girls I’ve been with.

                  If you want high quality women, then being honest isn’t even an option.

                  It’s a brutal fact of life that most top quality Pinoy women will not sleep with you unless there’s commitment or potential marriage on the cards. Practically no decent Pinoy women are fucking white guys just for sport anymore, so a player has to use all the weapons at his disposal.

                  Banging sluts and hookers just isn’t satisfying for me. I want the untouched women and I’m prepared to do whatever it takes to get them.

                  And Dante, wishing ill on your fellow human beings is sad, and preaching your divine karma justice is very dishonest too. You’re just white knighting and trying to cockblock me. We are both scum bags, but at least I’m honest about it.

                • kick2dante kick2dante says:

                  quit calling yourself a player….. players dont need to move to the easiest place in the world to get laid AND lie to girls…. you say being white isn’t enough anymore, actually it still is, you just have to put in a tiny amount of effort, too bad you are a sociopath and cant see how much of a piece of shit you are, well, deep down you kinda know you are a piece of shit, but you dont fully know how much of a piece of shit you are

                  ive never once white knighted a girl here and never will, you calling yourself a player and honest is about as hypocritical as anything ive ever seen

                  anyways, im done responding to you, go ahead and have the last word, lets just both hope you get all that you deserve

  4. anonym says:

    do u still play poker dante? or you work on your blog fulltime now? hows the internet in vietnam for an online poker pro? trustworthy or shit..

  5. BangkokBaller23 says:

    Another great, honest, write-up! 😊

    For Saigon, u definitely have to “modify” your game from Phils or LoS. That said, ANY foreigner can be Fing normal (non-P4P) Viet hotties. I disagree with the “Viet girls don’t like foreigners assessment”. IMHO it seemed like the majority did….or were at least “curious”, and interested.

    Walking on the street near crowds/landmarks it wasn’t uncommon for a Viet chic to take a pic of me/with me. That’s something I NEVER got (without me approaching first) in LoS.

    Suggestions for solo travelers looking to “F” multiple non-p4P Viets:
    1-They want to meet u thru “serendipity”. A random encounter, that ends up being romantic unexpectedly….which ultimately leads to sex. Coming across as “Do u wanna F? Y/N?” Or anything approaching that Vibe is a BIG no-no.
    2-Given #1, you should GO WHERE THERE ARE! Best places to “randomly” hit up Viet Hotties are coffee shops, the street, night time plazas, tourist areas, swimming pools (yes, some cutie tried to pick me up in the pool because her husband was overseas🤔🤣), nightclubs, restaurant cafes, etc.
    3-Just go be a “Dumb Tourist” (but….with an Agenda! That being of course to hit up Viet hotties). Take pics, ask directions, ask if they speak English, ask if u can take a pic with them in front of XYZ, just be SILLY AS F!😁
    4-Expect “instadates” or Day 1’s to all just be exchanging contacts, setting up a date, possibly a make-out. Day 2’s are they meet you at your hotel and give u a ride from there (motorbike). Worst case, yeah you can meet them at the venue.

    If she comes to your hotel to pick you up. Tell her you are running a bit late and to come up. If/when she does, show her around but DO NOTHING! Now, at the end of the date, she has been there before, knows it’s safe, and what’s the big deal about coming up again to a place she’s already been?

    So, Day 2 do the date and end up back at your hotel and invite her up to show her your travel pics on your computer! Or whatever else you are into. Tell her you had fun, like her, and want her to know more about you. Once upstairs, the F inevitably happens!😎

    Good luck to those willing to give Vietnam a shot!?!?!

    • jspill jspill says:

      Another great comment! Agree it’s a good place if you like a challenge and quality over quantity.

      I think they like foreigners too but are shy to be judged as a hooker if they’re seen with us. Like the girl said in the chat above, foreigners have a reputation for treating girls a bit better, at least compared to Asian guys (stereotypes of wife beating / infidelity / alcoholism).

      But increasingly we are getting stereotyped as going to Asia for ONS and hookers and Viet girls are a bit smarter.

      There’s also seems to be less Viet men that are gay (definitely less ladyboys) so more competition for chicks.

      • BangkokBaller23 says:

        Yeah, IF you come off as a “sex tourist” there for ONS and nothing more, you put yourself in a box limited to P4P, massage girls, etc.

        My main point is that those Viet girls who are into foreigners all have a fantasy of meeting a foreigner dude who’s there “randomly” doing “random” S. I.e. Taking pics, seeing the sights, exploring the country because your Dad served there and now he passed away, etc etc.

        Give them The Fantasy!?!?! They will actually, F the hell out of you and be super appreciative. Then, cut short the total Fantasy by re-iterating you have to keep things “just dating” because of XYZ (you are scared to get hurt….again, you want to meet lots of Viet people and experience the culture, you are too independent to get tied down, etc.) ***Feel free to use these BTW***😎

    • How about Korea and Japan? Do those places have similar potential?

      A big problem I have with Vietnam in general is it’s pretty boring outside of eating, going to the beach and chasing women. That shit gets old after like 6 months.

      • Henry says:

        “But increasingly we are getting stereotyped as going to Asia for ONS and hookers and Viet girls are a bit smarter.”

        Yep… same in Phils… thanx Spirit Maze 😉

      • jspill jspill says:

        @Mikey Never been to either… hard to live in Japan long term as a digital nomad with their visa system, and I feel you’d need to live there long term to get the most out of it. I do want to do a trip there tho

        @Henry lololol

      • kick2dante kick2dante says:

        the girls speak almost no english, i think japanese girls have a bit more of a thing for foreigners but not all of them

        however the pay for play in both is very hard if you aren’t a local, you aren’t allowed in most of the best spots

  6. -Cam says:

    The freelancer is cutiepie. How do the prices and service compare to LoS?

    • jspill jspill says:

      $40-60 starting tourist rate in the capital for 60 mins (1 – 1.5 million dong) for first timer off wechat that has to give their pimp a cut

      The even figure of 1 million dong can be their mental ‘sticking point’ that they don’t want to go under, like how Thais might do an even 1000 baht but get offended at 900 baht. My trick was to reply ‘ok $40’ as that’s a nice even figure and it’s 900k dong hehe. Make out like I hadn’t converted my dollars yet

      As that other guy commented outside the capital it can be $11 for 30 mins, so I’m sure you can find $20-30 if you shop around

      But mercenary service, money upfront, no GFE, hurry up and cum, one pop, condom, less oral, in general absolutely awful compared to LoS and PI, one girl stopped the sex before I finished said time is up ‘I call boss’ and then ‘fuck you I kill you’ on her way out, I checked the time she was in my room 40 mins total agreed on an hour

      I got it on video and will do a post soon

      If I had just flown in from the West and never been to LoS or PI I might ok yeah this is how prostitution is supposed to be, make sense, oh well never mind

      Oh and a different girl turned up it was supposed to be that one in the pic, one that turned up was still hot though, that’s the only saving grace, they’re hot, so if you get a few regulars that aren’t bitches…

    • nightlifeguy says:

      the wechat one at top left is smoking in that black outfit

  7. Anonymous says:

    I being follow your page for sometime…
    Im a asia chinese guy
    What u think my chance on vietnam?

    Bring thailand many times no problem…so far
    Not pros just a beginner
    Wanna try my luck over vietnam

    I perfer long time with my girl at hotel
    Does the wechat hooker have offer that..

    Or maybe find a gf n settle down is a good idea too ..
    Haha

    • jspill jspill says:

      I think better chance than white guys

      My wechat hooker said $100 for long time. Most will do it but it’s risky cos they ask for money upfront, so they might try to leave early with your money

      • BangkokBaller23 says:

        NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, EVER give the $$$ up front!

        We all know this thru hard won experience! I’d rather walk the F out than EVER give the $$$ up front. Performance drops dramatically, time drops, everything. As soon as she gets the $$$ you have given EVERY financial incentive to her to be a short and crappy F.

        Don’t do it! EVER….

        • Anonymous says:

          The vietnam wechat hooker so smoking hot.
          But will they come or agree without upfront?

        • jspill jspill says:

          They’ll come first then ask for upfront once in your room

          Most likely they’ll still bang if you say no. You could just show them the cash then put it back in your wallet

      • Anonymous says:

        From what i read on other sticky and a farang and also your blog.
        Vietnam girl are more like on western people or curious abt them.
        Since im a chinese i will look alike them not sure they willing to talk with me.
        But i know that vietnam ppl some know how to speak chinese is that true?
        Im a chinese singapore guy..haha

        Plan to go to vietnam on september
        How long i should stay to make 1 date girl willing to come my room or comfortable enough with me

        • jspill jspill says:

          I think what they mean is girls are a bit more ‘westernized’ as in the country is more developed, closer to first world asian countries, so the girls are smarter.

          Viet girls love singapore, the ones I met were always talking about wanting to go there for shopping, and mixed nationality is also quite fashionable. I’d say they like guys from countries with lighter skin and more money, so it doesn’t really matter if it’s a richer light skin Asian guy or a richer white guy.

          • Jan says:

            Then i should try my luck this sep

            Stay for a week maybe

            On district 1

            Even cant get a girl at least have some beer,massage to kill the time

            How your stay in vietnam for a month.Face any scam,rob,thief?

            • jspill jspill says:

              Lot of phone snatchers but they mostly target girls. Saw it happen to one. Just be careful with your phone outside. Dante wrote about an airport taxi scam in another post.

              And wechat girl left mid bang 🙁

    • BangkokBaller23 says:

      Yeah, any guy of Asian decent could KILL in Saigon! Just work on your game & strategize a bit beforehand. Then just make sure to NOT fall in ❤️❤️❤️🤣

      • How old are you, Bangkok Baller? You sound like a guy who’s been around the block haha.

        @Dante @Jspill you guys need to add a donation button. Really love your blog. It’s become my go-to instead of NN or RVF lately.

        • BangkokBaller23 says:

          In life experience I’d like to think I’m like 1000 years old. But in maturity level, like 16….TOPS!?!🤣

      • jspill jspill says:

        Thanks man I swear this blog has the best commenters ever.

        Well indirectly if you sign up to a dating site you haven’t used yet, then we get a few bucks. That way you get something too.

        Or check back when you book agoda hotels / buy something on amazon and use the links here.

        • BangkokBaller23 says:

          Yeah, I’ve been following Stickyboy Bangkok and A Farang Abroad for a while BUT…..YOUR BLOG IS KILLING IT RIGHT NOW!?!?!

          The fact that you are giving us no BS, real-time, honest and sincere opinion, backed up with screen shots and pics of the TRUE deal of your experiences is PRICELESS!?!?! Keep it up man!😎

  8. R says:

    Good post and cool blog.

    As someone who lives in Vietnam, I’d say that your expirience is pretty common.

    I enjoy living here, but Ho Chi Minh (and the rest of the country for that matter) is NOTHING like Thailand or the Philippines.

    Filipinas and Thai chicks are into hook-ups, and one night stands are pretty common.

    In Vietnam, this stuff is way more difficult to do, unless you live here long-term.

    ‘Nam’s probably one of the harder countries to get laid in, with a massive difficulty curve for any short-term travelers.

    If you live there for 6+ months, things get way easier (though never to Thailand levels), but that’s longer than most guys will put up with.

    Tl;Dr: nice country, but kind of like visiting America in the 50’s when it comes to sexual liberation / dating scene.

  9. Nick says:

    “Jspill tells me there is an amazing clubbing scene where you can safely and openly do drugs, everyone in the club is rolling on ecstasy, ketamine, the waiters can get it for you and there are hot PR girls you hire to party with you and snort K off their wrists.”

    Go on…

  10. HCM says:

    I’ve been living in HCM for over a year now and am just about to leave. The traffic, pollution and heat has finally got to me as have the rising costs, it’s just not that cheap anymore. It’s also really annoying not being able to walk anywhere due to idiots driving on the pavements.

    Having lived and traveled Vietnam extensively there are much better places to live here. In fact most Viets you meet don’t want to be in HCM, they’re just here because their salaries are 4-5 times more than anywhere else in Vietnam.

    If you’re looking for the quiet life near the beach there are some great cheaper option that are up and coming such as Da Nang which i’d recommend over HCM any day.

    I actually had a lot more success with girls in Da Nang compared with HCM. The girls tend to get prettier the further north you go to i find. The Saigonese look is kinda plain and sullen, whereas the girls further north are more petite, curious and more fun to be around.

    I think western culture is starting to take hold here and that’s not necessarily a good thing. Tinder usage is rife in HCM which is ok for hook ups but obviously not for long term.

    I’m thinking of checking out the Phils next in a few weeks as haven’t been yet so will be interesting to see how it compares…

  11. Pplover says:

    I disagree with your take on HCM. I saw loads of western guys with drop dead gorgeous Vietnamese girls. I was very envious.

    I hooked up with a great girl through Tinder although most using that were obviously prostitutes. She had fluent english and was highly educated. Great company too. What a pleasure to spend time with a beautiful confident girl with personality, sense of humour and strong opinions.

    I agree with your views on lying to get girls into bed. SE Asia is being overrun by PUA creeps. It trashes the status of western men.

  12. Pplover says:

    @ HCM. I agree about westernisation. Girl I was with told me that younger women in HCM want to do their own thing and not into no sex before marriage. However she reckoned rural areas and north still very conservative.

    • Which is more westernized, Saigon or Bangkok? I think if you take away the tourists in both cities, they aren’t that westernized imo. The Philippines by a long shot is the most westernized country in Asia. Catholic and English widely spoken. Lemme see if I have this right –

      PH > SG (Singapore) > TW/HK/JP > BKK/Thailand = HCMC/Vietnam > MY (Malaysia > Indo > Cambodia > Laos

      This was tough to do bc obviously capital cities are gonna be much more Western than 2nd tier cities, but some were more obvious than others. Outside of Tokyo or Osaka, JP isn’t that Western at all. Same with Taiwan outside of Taipei. Feel free to make any corrections.

      • Shit, I just realized I forgot about Korea (excluding North) and China. China might be the least westernized country in EA/SEA bc I always see Chinatowns everywhere, so that would imply a stubbornness to accept Western virtue or lifestyle.

        • Akog says:

          Depends where you are in China many major cities are very westernized. Shanghai is very much so. Most people living there are young people with money to burn. They speak enough English to have conversation.

          Beijing chengdu very much same as well very westernized till you leave the city. I stayed about 2 hours outside chengdu i was only one speaking English in town was fun.

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